Golf

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

Official Thread Theme: www.youtube.com/watch?v=dmJefsOErr0

I think I've finally done it guys, I'm slowly becoming old and finding golf fascinating for some reason. I've started watching the PGA Tour and the golf channel. Probably gonna grab some clubs and start swanging soon. Seriously there's like 7 videos in my YouTube history just about golf clubs and like 20 videos about Tiger Woods.

Speaking of which, can we please talk about what a fucking GOAT Tiger Woods is?

Michael Jordan said:

"There's only one athlete I idolize, and that's Tiger Woods."

Tiger basically became the GOAT at age 24 or some shit, literally shattered golf records left right and center. He was a child prodigy who stepped onto the course and truly delivered. Somehow the genetic combo of African and Thai ends up creating the greatest golfer the world has ever seen. The athleticism of blacks with the zen like focus on Buddhist monks. Woods is like a fucking psychic with a golf club, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Putter. He seemed invincible up until the early 2010s where he finally fucked his shit up. After inspiring literally everyone younger than him who ever golfed to pick up a golf club dreaming of being like Tiger Woods, Tiger himself ended up fucking up his marriage by slamming over 120 women, all of them white. This guy was literally paying bitches millions of dollars just to shut the fuck up about ever meeting him. Then he sustained major back and knee injuries until he had to call it quits for a while. Then, miraculously, he slowly started to come back to the game of golf in his 40s, finally winning the Master's Tournament again, 12 years removed from when he last wore the Green Jacket. It's seriously inspiring, imagine if Jordan had won the NBA Finals and got Finals MVP in his 40s on the Washington Wizards, it just seems impossible. But that's the great thing about golf in my eyes, rather than relying on skills that diminish heavily with age (such as your ability to run and jump high), golf is really about standing in one place and exerting a shitton of force, accurately. That's how there are still men in their late 40s like Phil Mickelson on the PGA Tour and how Woods could return to be an overwhelming force on the course. It seems like a game that you can keep playing and learning well into your older years, which is something I find attractive as in time, I too will be an old ass man.















Here's the film about how Tiger actually fucking came back and won it all at age 43



Also which not technically sports related, feel free to discuss 2020's Game of the Year



So discuss golf, share golf stories and post pics of any golf gear you might have.

[Hauskaz]

I maybe have a passing interest in golf. Like I'm complete trash on a golf course and wouldn't even bother but I don't mind watching it and golf games are alright in my book.

[Cheesemaster VI]

Lee Carvallo's Putting Challenge is the only good golf game.

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

I seriously want to find out where Howard Varner got these Air Jordan golf shirts, man has a whole collection of them like Jordan sponsored him or something. Seriously, a golf course is one of the only places a man in his 20s or 30s could unironically wear a beret and look fashionable. Just the entire chicness of golf outerwear has me itching to blow my wallet on some clothing I could stain green.

Jun 15, 2020 21:55:18 GMT -5 Hauskaz said:

I maybe have a passing interest in golf. Like I'm complete trash on a golf course and wouldn't even bother but I don't mind watching it and golf games are alright in my book.

Given that you are Tiger's distant cousin (you both even have overly complicated names) you must at least have some inkling of that zenlike buddhist monk concentration and focus that Woods' has. Honestly a huge part of why I'm interested in golfing now is because I've honestly gained like 70 lbs of mostly muscle over the past 7 years. Basically every year I put on 10lbs of muscle, I float around 195-200lbs. I went from having a slimmer cardio kind of build to having really bulky, broad shoulders heavy set kind of build. I can't run as fast or the long distances I used to, but I've gotten pretty fucking strong. So even if I'm no precise putter like Woods, Mickelson and McIlroy, I think I may just enjoy golf 90% just for seeing how fucking far I could hit the goddamn ball. Driving ability is one of the more important skills a golfer could have, things like being bulky or not as tall don't really matter as much in this sport. Even Michael Jordan would talk about how it would frustrate him seeing significantly shorter, but bulkier men drive the ball nearly twice the distance he could. At the very least, I wanna see how hard I could drive the ball.

Fun fact: the dimples on golf balls actually help to send it further by creating a turbulent airforce boundary around the ball, the turbulent flow of air isn't formed nearly as well by a smooth ball. This was only discovered by people realizing that the nicked up and beaten golf balls always flew further than the brand new smooth ones.

Anyways, time to browse Amazon for the cheapest, shittiest set of 14 clubs I can find.

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

Forget about Jesus and the Gospel, the Life and Times of Tiger Woods is the greatest story ever told.



Like the Bible, it is a story of a Father and Son. His father crafted him into the perfect soldier on the golf course, literally channeling his Vietnam War trauma and Afroasian mysticisms into his son named after a Vietnamese soldier he met on the battlefield. Tiger and his father deserves a Last Dance style documentary series of their own. He architected the perfect machine by basically forcing his son through Vietnam on a golf course. If you were to ask me if I'm more obsessed with golf itself than Tiger Woods, I'm not actually sure how to answer that question. Because the entire conundrum is that Tiger Woods has essentially become the sport of golf itself. He had to force himself to live two lives, one as a perfect corporate entity, a top of the top tier athlete performing near perfectly executed technique in golf. He is Superman and Clark Kent at once, floating down to Earth in an oversized sweater with a golf club in hand, a Nike Logo emblazoned on his chest. People flock to him as a symbol of hope. They believe in him when the world doesn't, the near constant enormous crowds following him are practically his hallmark.



His redemption arc is beyond any film, tv series or anime. Tiger Woods is the main protagonist.





Also, can we please take a moment to appreciate the absolute GOATs of advertising that the Nike Gods are? Tiger Woods was their superhero, and delivered the single greatest shot in professional golf, that also ended up being the greatest Nike product placement of all time. Just look at how the ball hangs on the lip of the hole for a brief moment, before showing the logo and going in.





I want you all to think about two things: first of all, understand that Tiger Woods is the superhero corporate white America dreamed of, an absolute master of the sport of golf who would unapologetically seal his entire existence with the logos of every company that would pay him to. Tiger Woods is the living embodiment of the perfect product placement. At the same time, also understand that Tiger Woods is a byproduct of the inherent racism of 1970s America and the golf community of that era. Tiger Woods was called nigger to his face several times throughout his life, many of the time by white adult golfers who would tell him he didn't belong on a golf course. This created two Tigers: the corporate superhero near permanently emblazoned with a Nike logo on his hat who behaved perfectly, never did anything out of line and had a perfectly crafted image; the other Tiger is a man who fucked over 120 bitches, all white, usually while choking them, beating them, calling them sluts and whores and basically working out all those years of rage from being called a nigger on the golf course on the trashy young white women of America. This is Superman and Clark Kent.

And honestly, just stop and think about that. That's just 120 women people know of Tiger Woods fucked. That's a lot of bitches man. In fact just to illustrate it, allow me to type the word "bitches" 120 times

BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES



That's how many goddamn bitches Tiger Woods just got caught cheating on his wife with. He was uncontrollably addicted to that white pussy, and still is to this day. Charlamagne the God was right: Tiger Woods needs his white women.

And so began the fall of Tiger, from being the unbreakable GOAT to having a myriad of health problems, spinal and nerve injuries, constant sex scandals and just generally fucking his shit up. He was forced to perform the fakest corporate apology to a bunch of CEOs after his scandals came out, and lost many of those sponsors in the fallout. He was nearly unable to play anywhere near the level he used to for years.





Miraculously, after spinal fusion surgery and years of steadily training himself to become stronger, in his 40s Tiger began to rejoin golf tournaments and competing. Eventually, he began winning tournaments. It was, unironically, the greatest comeback in modern sports history.









It's just hard to believe that the kid who once said he was gonna beat Jack Nicklaus as a three year old has come this far forty years later. At 44 he is still the number one attraction and the American Legend that every other player aspires to be even a little bit like. Tiger Woods is the Sport of Golf.

[Batmanuel]

Truly, an inspiration

[Hauskaz]

Jun 17, 2020 0:00:24 GMT -5 Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers said:

Fun fact: the dimples on golf balls actually help to send it further by creating a turbulent airforce boundary around the ball, the turbulent flow of air isn't formed nearly as well by a smooth ball. This was only discovered by people realizing that the nicked up and beaten golf balls always flew further than the brand new smooth ones.

Supposedly cars have less aerodynamic drag when dirty for this reason, although you also lose down force on your wings/canards/etc.

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

Turbulent flow in general is just fucking cool and has a huge variety of practical uses. Laminar flow looks nice and can be used for decorative purposes, but has very few practical uses. Literally the light on Earth only hits us because the Sun is a massive ball of turbulent gasses constantly reacting.

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

Look: I would only tell you guys the truth. It's all I've ever told you guys. And the truth is, the best mobile game I've ever played in my life is definitely Golf Clash. CoD Mobile is some Chinese trash that was easily broken by PC players joining in and dabbing on touchscreen manlets. Not only is it Western developed, but even on desktop, Golf Clash is still absolutely a game where only the greatest will triumph.



Seriously, you guys need to try this app. Let us not mince words here: Golf Clash is a game for MEN. And women who also enjoy golf, some of them are hotties. This is a game that actually requires talent, strategy and ingenuity, as real golf should. I actually sat down and tried like 7 other golf games but, all of 'em ended up being trash. Even the official PGA Tour Shootout app is not that great. Golf Clash includes things like wind, ball spin, hitting the ball into trees, getting the ball hit off a cliff, emoji convos with the opponent in realtime, various wedges and irons of all types. And a robust system of increasing in rank and course difficulty, tournaments, clans, a microtransaction store I'm very tempted to give in to. Honestly just playing the game will unlock most of the clubs for you, in the end this is absolutely a game of skill. Most of them are cartoonish and silly, but this all just makes the game more fun. There is no better feeling than sitting at work, not working, and instead landing an Eagle on some 10 year old kid in Karachi. Honestly, I have never wholeheartedly enjoyed a mobile game in my life, and doubt I ever will enjoy another this much.



This game will not only make a solid holdover game until 2020 GOTY PGA Tour 2K21 drops, and will always serve as a quick 5 minute pick up and play game whenever you feel like it. We should all run golf matches together in Clash, it'll be fun. I'm trying to get everyone I know to try it.

This guy made an entire YouTube channel dedicated to improving at Golf Clash. I'm not even mad, I'm impressed.

[Batmanuel]

This game was fun for a while, up until I started only encountering people that have poured tons of cash into all the golf clubs. Typical mobile game bullshit

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

Jun 25, 2020 16:31:05 GMT -5 Batmanuel said:

This game was fun for a while, up until I started only encountering people that have poured tons of cash into all the golf clubs. Typical mobile game bullshit

So, it's an accurate reflection of golf itself? My supervisor is trying to sell his Nike irons for $500 so he can blow $2000 on a KZG club set. He spent $100 on a bucket of 300 Nike golf balls, Woods' herculean product placement worked. Guy has the black swoosh hat and maroon sweater and everything. Golf has always been a rich man's sport. I daresay you haven't truly tried to excel at the game though. You can make it damn far without even needing to spend a dime. This being said, they say the first step of solving a problem is admitting you have one. And well... maybe I have one.



I so far have spent $4 on this game and have a ton of epic and rare clubs. End of the day, those clubs can only take you so far, you need to be strategic and play the game smart. I'm out here playing this game all night like it's Call of Duty.

I think I may be changing. A lot. My girlfriend asked me if I'm having a mid-life crisis because I keep watching the NBC Golf Channel all day. My interest in things I used to love like anime, video games, electronics and 4chan is waning dramatically day by day. I feel like taking the $2000+ I had set aside for the RTX 3080 Ti and just buying a solid set of Callaway irons, a Taylor Made putter, a Cobra club bag and of course, the Cobra King Speedzone.





I was willing to spend $4 on Golf Clash because even before paypigging, I had had more fun with this game than some games I've spent $40, $60, even $80 on. Perhaps it's time to stop playing childish video games and become a man. And the truth is, every man I've ever admired is a golfer. Jordan, Woods, Bill Gates, every US President, Jeff Bezos, Snoop Dogg, Adam Sandler, Larry David, Lewis Hamilton, Tom Brady, the list goes on. Finally it feels refreshing to be a novice in something where skill and strategy are all that matter.

[Hauskaz]

That driver looks like a cross between some Razer gaymen shit and a fucking brake caliper. I hope someone makes clubs with addressable RGB LED's.

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

Jun 25, 2020 19:19:35 GMT -5 Hauskaz said:

That driver looks like a cross between some Razer gaymen shit and a fucking brake caliper. I hope someone makes clubs with addressable RGB LED's.

Tyler that driver will run you like 7 bills. Doesn't even glow in the dark. Golf is a deep dark hole you fall into, much like PC gaming. You could be a scrub and buy some shitty starter club set for under $500, or be an OG and blow over $2000 customizing your bag, driver, irons, putters, ironhead covers and so forth. Really, golf and PC gaming have a lot in common.


And now I've cleared Tour 3, moving onto 4 cause landing these Eagles is ez.

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

Soon.

[keekee987]

I love golf, this is my hobby since childhood. I studied for a long time and improved my skills as a player and now I already have a fairly high level. But if you are with an average handicap and want to improve your game stats, you can find out more here golf-hook.com/reviews/best-golf-drivers-for-mid-handicappers/ . According to the USGA, golf handicaps are used to level the playing field between players of all skill levels. Nearly 50% of golfers fall into the middle handicap range. Most players with an average handicap have large "zones of the best". As a result, the balls fly faster, farther and more accurately.