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Post by Kirkwood Chocolate on Feb 2, 2023 3:59:51 GMT -5
>Less than 100 days until the single most anticipated video game of all-time releases.
>We know barely fucking know anything at all about it.
Let's be real: if this isn't at least a 96 on Metacritic and unanimously GotY 2023, it will automatically be a disappointment. If this game gets a 9 out of 10 from IGN, immediately the entire internet will erupt into an uproar that TotK is dead on arrival because it was only a 9 with the Nintendo Bonus. Like it or not, the fate of gaming and Nintendo itself hangs in the balance with this one fucking game, just like it did in 2017 with Breath of the Wild. Can lightning strike twice?
Can this game actually be the swansong of a generation and save gaming, or is this not the second coming of Christ moment we've been waiting for? Personally I think this will be the last Zelda game in the timeline starting from Skyward Sword as outlined in Hyrule Historia. After this conclusion of the conflict with Ganondorf and the end of Demise' curse, the series will likely take a long hiatus. Expect either Link or Zelda to die.
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Post by Kirkwood Chocolate on Feb 6, 2023 1:19:01 GMT -5
Looks like a Direct is around the corner, we will probably get the last trailer soon. I always thought of Breath of the Wild as an analogy of Nintendo itself. The game came out at a time when Nintendo was at its lowest points in the company's history, and the game's release marked the biggest turnaround the company could have possibly had. Like the Kingdom of Nintendo had been haunted by the Calamity Station 4, an ancient evil that has persisted through 4 console generations. Breath of the Wild itself was like Link, suddenly awoken and tasked with saving Nintendo from the corruption of the Wii U plague. Wielding the Master Switch, Link conquered the Calamity Station, saved Nintendo and won every single GotY award unanimously. Really I do wonder if Tears of the Kingdom can measure up to such a monumental achievement, the legacy of BotW hangs over the game like a shadow. I suspect this game will be the last mainline Zelda game for about 7 years, we likely won't get a new Zelda until a 4K Nintendo console comes around. Tears of the Kingdom will likely be representative of the pinnacle of modern game design that could possibly be achieved by the Switch console, and the swansong of this Nintendo generation. There will probably be an upgraded version for the Switch 2. But the game will represent an actual ending of the Zelda timeline, following Breath of the Wild's unification of the splintered timelines.  I suspect this game will represent a definitive ending to "this" Zelda timeline that started in Skyward Sword with the curse of Demise. Expect Zelda or Link to actually die and several homages to all major titles in the series. There's also a theory that because of the floating islands, this game may actually also represent a circular timeline. As in, the sky islands eventually become Skyloft from Skyward Sword, and the timeline starts over. Although I'm more skeptical of this idea. After this game, future Zelda titles will take place in a new timeline that may not even involve Ganondorf at all, as he will be finally defeated in this game. Essentially a new genesis for the series after the conclusion of almost 40 years of storytelling. |
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Post by Kirkwood Chocolate on Apr 14, 2023 5:05:37 GMT -5
That goddamn saxophone came in like righteousness! Well shit. They're just plain dropping the best game ever made.
🎷
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Post by Kirkwood Chocolate on May 2, 2023 0:18:48 GMT -5
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Post by Kirkwood Chocolate on May 4, 2023 6:14:36 GMT -5
Let it be known that Mike Mohamed has already helped to create Tears of the Kingdom speedrunning tech over a week before the game even comes out. I also uploaded it under my anonymous channel forward youngman, but the Ninjas will probably take that one down. In any case, I am the inventor of this shit thank you very much. |
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Post by Kirkwood Chocolate on May 12, 2023 11:13:56 GMT -5
New Zelda commercial directed by Darren Aronofsky. This is the typical modern white man.
"Don't have white children. Just marry asian and escape the boredom and ennui of your middle aged life by playing Nintendo children's games while drinking tap water."
See if I was directing this commercial, I would have made it kino: Guy comes home off the bus all excited to dock his Switch and keep playing Zelda. As he's playing the game on the sofa, suddenly his wife calls him, "Oh honey~". He turns back and looks, and his wife is completely dressed up in Zelda's ancient princess outfit. Complete with dyed blonde hair, Hylian ears and everything. She then holds up a coathanger with the same Zonai toga that Link wears in the game, and winks at him. First the guy looks surprised, them smiles, puts down the controller and gets up and walks towards his wife. And then the camera poetically zooms in on the tv as Link's jumping off the sky island and the voice over comes in. "Reinvigorate your marriage with The Legend of Zelda Tears of the Kingdom. Only on Nintendo Switch."
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Post by Kirkwood Chocolate on May 16, 2023 5:31:04 GMT -5
Man fuck everybody. Nintendo did it. They made the best game ever made. When I saw the metacritic rating I felt like Kawhi Leonard yelling at the referees during the NBA finals when the Raptors had already won. I wanted two more points on the board. This game objectively deserves to be rated higher than BotW because it's literally a superior game by every conceivable metric. The fucking evergame. You could play this shit till time itself ended, even if you 100% cleared it you could find new ways to play the game for years to come. What the fuck man. I never even liked Zelda that much before BotW but this game just amps everything up to a new level. Ultrahand and Recall alone are insane feats of technical design, and then Autobuild just makes the game devs seem like wizards. How does this game even exist?
First few days in, found the Hylian Shield, raided the fuck out of Hyrule Castle, cleared the surface and sky maps, got Autobuild. I already got to the final boss area but I only had 5 hearts and hadn't done a single temple lmfao. Goddamn it is going to take at least a month for me to beat the game, and then continuously play it to 100% for the rest of the year.
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Post by Kirkwood Chocolate on May 19, 2023 0:39:08 GMT -5
Got the Master Sword despite only having 6 hearts, haven't done a single temple yet. Honestly? Best Master Sword quest in any Zelda game, period. Got it yesterday morning, so it only took me about 6 days.  |
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Post by Kirkwood Chocolate on May 23, 2023 23:22:38 GMT -5
Status: Full stamina, 11 hearts, Tulin been pulling weight. This game is fucking easy, just don't get hit. Just ripped the crystal run in 30 seconds flat. This game is just like Ace Combat.
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