Post by Hauskaz on May 29, 2008 19:37:27 GMT -5
Time to write some more shit to inflate WhatPulse. Today, we'll be looking at what each world continent offers in terms of music. I had originally intended to review individual countries, but besides the sheer number of them, there are a lot of countries I wanted to write about but didn't have enough material from. Nevertheless, here's an opinion on world music.
North America
North America has its hits and misses, but it's mostly misses. While notable groups such as Dream Theater, Rush and Steely Dan exist, North America is mainly riddled with awful rap and indie shit no one cares about. Canada in particular is almost completely worthless for musical composition or talent, with very few tokens standing out. The United States has some potential, but blacks and suicidal teens in tight pants are determined to strike down anything worth listening to. Mexico has some cool brass stuff going on, but it's not stuff I would sit and listen to. Compositional and performing skill also seem to be lacking in North America. There's an exceptional number of shit bands playing shit songs in Canada and the US. Sell your instruments and shut the fuck up already.
Selection: 3/10
Composition: 5/10
Talent: 6/10
Verdict: Mostly worthless, save for a few exceptions.
Europe
If it weren't for Europe, music probably wouldn't be worth listening to. Europe manages to nail everything perfectly, regardless of genre. From the electronica of Germany and France, to the classic and progressive rock of Britain, and even all the way up to the advanced metal of the Nordic regions, Europe sure knows how to deliver. Talent shines through the composition, performance and even the mixing. the list of great artists just doesn't end. Like any other region, Europe has its share of musical failures, but the sheer amounts of amazing work drown it out. It would do the world a favour if every other continent burned their stockpiles of musical instruments.
Selection: 9/10
Composition: 8/10
Talent: 8/10
Verdict: The continent other continents want to be.
Asia
Asia is an odd case. On one hand, most of Asia consists of compositional delinquency. However, there is a huge pool of talented performers playing their own bastardized versions of foreign music. Countries like Japan, China and Korea have done little to impress me on a theoretical level, but they've pumped out some exceptional carbon clones of pretty much everything else. J-anything may be utter trash, but there's a huge assortment of western-esque works of reputable quality. Unfortunately, one thing that will always annoy me will be the Asian languages themselves. They tend to blend poorly into music. Japanese, Chinese, Siamese, and south Asian languages are particularly high offenders. I've heard very few lyrical songs that are tolerable in these languages. Other languages are slightly more manageable, but they just don't stack up well against their Latin adversaries.
Selection: 6/10
Composition: 3/10
Talent: 9/10
Verdict: The place to find your musicians, but for Christ's sake, don't let them write anything.
South America, Africa, Australia
I can't think of anything significant about these continents. They exist and nothing more.
Verdict: Who cares about these places?
Antarctica
If anyone besides scientists lived in Antarctica, they would make fucking amazing music.
Verdict: We need Antarctic music.
North America
North America has its hits and misses, but it's mostly misses. While notable groups such as Dream Theater, Rush and Steely Dan exist, North America is mainly riddled with awful rap and indie shit no one cares about. Canada in particular is almost completely worthless for musical composition or talent, with very few tokens standing out. The United States has some potential, but blacks and suicidal teens in tight pants are determined to strike down anything worth listening to. Mexico has some cool brass stuff going on, but it's not stuff I would sit and listen to. Compositional and performing skill also seem to be lacking in North America. There's an exceptional number of shit bands playing shit songs in Canada and the US. Sell your instruments and shut the fuck up already.
Selection: 3/10
Composition: 5/10
Talent: 6/10
Verdict: Mostly worthless, save for a few exceptions.
Europe
If it weren't for Europe, music probably wouldn't be worth listening to. Europe manages to nail everything perfectly, regardless of genre. From the electronica of Germany and France, to the classic and progressive rock of Britain, and even all the way up to the advanced metal of the Nordic regions, Europe sure knows how to deliver. Talent shines through the composition, performance and even the mixing. the list of great artists just doesn't end. Like any other region, Europe has its share of musical failures, but the sheer amounts of amazing work drown it out. It would do the world a favour if every other continent burned their stockpiles of musical instruments.
Selection: 9/10
Composition: 8/10
Talent: 8/10
Verdict: The continent other continents want to be.
Asia
Asia is an odd case. On one hand, most of Asia consists of compositional delinquency. However, there is a huge pool of talented performers playing their own bastardized versions of foreign music. Countries like Japan, China and Korea have done little to impress me on a theoretical level, but they've pumped out some exceptional carbon clones of pretty much everything else. J-anything may be utter trash, but there's a huge assortment of western-esque works of reputable quality. Unfortunately, one thing that will always annoy me will be the Asian languages themselves. They tend to blend poorly into music. Japanese, Chinese, Siamese, and south Asian languages are particularly high offenders. I've heard very few lyrical songs that are tolerable in these languages. Other languages are slightly more manageable, but they just don't stack up well against their Latin adversaries.
Selection: 6/10
Composition: 3/10
Talent: 9/10
Verdict: The place to find your musicians, but for Christ's sake, don't let them write anything.
South America, Africa, Australia
I can't think of anything significant about these continents. They exist and nothing more.
Verdict: Who cares about these places?
Antarctica
If anyone besides scientists lived in Antarctica, they would make fucking amazing music.
Verdict: We need Antarctic music.
