Jerbs

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

yeah it's kind of funny, they tell us stories about the different airlines we have to service

Like apparently the Israeli (El Al) airlines are the worst. They have a bunch of mossadbro security guards come out and watch you while you unload everything. You can't have a cell phone near the plane, and they have to screen the guys going to work on the cargo. And then the actual passengers go through some secure way through the airport away from everyone else. Basically our trainer said, "These people think EVERYONE is out to get them."

But in contrast, the Arabs are cool as fuck. The Egyptians sometimes get to bring falcons IN the planes cabin to just chill on their shoulder and get fed seeds (only on their airlines); apparently if they have some religious permit, they're allowed to carry it with them EVERYWHERE. Also when King Abdullah came to G-20, apparently he tipped ALL the ramp guys $100 each. Also ended up inviting people in for drinks and fancy Saudi food they brought with them.

That and I have to memorize a ton of shit about different planes, how to service them etc. So yeah, it's not the best pay or hours in the world, but it seems pretty cool.

[DeliciousMist]

It seems like it'd be a dangerous job but I don't really know. As long as you like it then whatevs

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

I don't think I can enjoy working anymore without some level of danger involved.

That's why my old refrigerated warehouse job was fun. There were horror stories about pallets falling on people, people thought ghosts were in the freezers, also warehouse people are just hilarious people in general. Also $18/h once you were in the company. The best part of the job was recklessly driving a forklift through high traffic freezers and seeing how fast I could pick orders. The worst part of the job was the fact that it was unionized.

I would basically just live in the freezer and listen to metal while picking.

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

oh baby



shit is so quiet with these things on

[Hauskaz]

rofl those things.

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

so here's some planes, the korean air one is a 747 and the emirates one is an airbus a380 iirc





lol I can read that

also here's a KLM Boeing B747-400 landing. This plane had a lot of animals and tropical fish on it, one Dutch guy named his dog Frodo. I suggest you watch this muted, you'll understand why we wear those things.



fun fact, that old guy who turns around and looked at me is 48 and has a masters degree in chemistry from ryerson. He has the same position as me.

I got offered a job at a warehouse as a machine operator $15/h, but fuck, this job is so much more cool. And I get to butt in line in front of airline passengers when they put me through the metal detector and check out foreign chicks in inbounds. Not sure whether or not to switch.[/blog]

[Hauskaz]

God your job looks so badass.

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

hey just remember: 10.50/h starting

That being said, this job is like, MAJOR LEAGUE loafting. Like literally just sitting around, texting people, talking to chicks in the duty free shop and in line at security, looking like a dick in a uniform while foreign invaders ask you questions in funny accents. good shit.

also my bad the Korean Air was actually a B777-300ER series. got a nice look into it today. I think I might see if I can become a security guard, that way I'll be an even bigger doofus in a uniform and actually get paid decently.

Here's the (EDIT: well, one of two) engine, it was still spinning a bit as I took this. this thing is as tall as two of me standing on top of each other, and if it was still running while I took this probably would have completely devoured me.





also if you've ever wondered what the inner cargo bay of comercial airline plane well... here ya go





and here's that bad boy rolling toward the apron

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

safety first

[Hauskaz]

Jesus, fuck that rofl.

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

I want to try sitting in an A380 engine, 737s are just tiny planes compared to that behemoth. pretty sure I'll get booked though because Emirates security is tight.

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

lol i got paid to watch 4 hours worth of tim hortons training videos

i never realized making an iced chocolate latte was so complicated

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

man

every friday i eat like $15 worth of free food from timmies just because they forget to make me pay for food (it's 50% off for us anyways). also I just make myself so many caramel americanos and shit that are like $3 multiple times throughout the day.

now that i've worked here long enough to see how everything works, all the magic of timmies is gone to me.

tim horton's is just the soviet canuckistan version of mcdonalds.

[Hauskaz]

You will eventually loathe the entire menu.

[Mr Momentum & the Sidesteppers]

honestly the coffee isn't really bad. we actually DO make sure that all the coffee we serve is brewed no more than 20 minutes prior to handing it to people. and rumours about us putting salt into the coffee to make it taste better or more addictive is just bullshit; people are addicted to caffeine, fat and sugar. also the shit like americanos/espressos/lattes is actually made with a $20,000something machine that gets cleaned/refilled on a daily basis. It's just the shit like the donuts is horrible unhealthy and completely slathered in icing sugar. You just see them all sitting there, just dripping with icing sugar, or the bakers are all pumping them up with lardiness right before putting icing on them. also pretty much all the bread (for sandwiches, muffins, donuts) is just frozen and then re-baked (I used to work at one of the facilities that stored and distributed that garbage). The ice caps are basically just a ton of cream mixed with very sugary syrup. also I realized there's like 14g of fat in a medium double double, which basically makes it as unhealthy as a mars bar or one of our donuts. And people drink that shit every morning. There's this one black dude who comes in every morning and orders an xtra large with something like 5 creams and 4 sugars. All I can think every time I serve him is that we're really fucking up that dude's heart. That's like 40g in fat and more sugar than a 591ml bottle of coke. just imagine a huge cup filled 50% with cream/sugar right before I pour coffee into it and that's basically what I'm serving the guy. It's almost like going to the grocery store and just straight up chugging one of those purple cartons of 18% cream

so I've basically never eaten donuts/muffins and exclusively put milk in my americanos, or just drink black coffee. I still feel guilty about eating the bagels/sandwiches because I see the bakers toss the frozen versions of them into the oven, but I try not to think about it. i order the exact same shit every day, 12 grain toasted sausage bagel belt with no cheese in the morning, ham and swiss on whole wheat with no ranch, no cheese and honey mustard sauce added with hearty vegetable soup. even though that's supposed to be like $15 when you include the free coffee/americanos I drink along with it, I usually end up paying less than $6 or nothing at all for them.

i'd post pictures but we're legally told not to take pictures of anything in the restaurant lol. people would stop eating the donuts if they saw them absolutely dripping with sugar in the back